Here I am at home for Tet again!
I’m in my room again and i realized it’s been years since I last slept here. If you ask, now I sleep with my mom whenever I’m back. Feel free to laugh if you wish. Previously my parents and sister would use the desktop placed in my room. Since when the laptop was introduced in the house, the desktop was abandonned and noone has been frequently sitting here literally. So guess what my Dad did? He has stored lots of stationery in.my.room. And that was oh-so-amazing man! You know I always love stationery. Nice pens, papers, scotch tapes, ruler, highlighters, pencils, calendar, picture frames, color pens, color post-it notes, toys, books, scissors … Everything here motivates me and gets me ready to work on anything. And have I mentioned about my chair? It’s big, comfortable and makes me feel like a boss LOL. I used to have a radio here but it has been out of order. With the radio, this would be a perfect studio of my dream.
I looked back to the days when I was in high school. Good ol’ times. Just look at my shelves and lockers, how could I be so creative and fun then? I could remember I panicked always when exams came but somehow I could still put that aside to make time for what I did. It was so good to see my old masterpieces hung around. And yes, a trace of the first love here is putting a smile on my face.
Look at me now? I’m not as crafty as that anymore. I always worry about deadlines, things to do now and things to do next. Yet most importantly, I find myself boring and not motivated to decorate my life. The last hand-made card that I made for Gau was probably the one for our 1st anniversary which is 3 years ago??! How ridiculous! How would I mark down our happy time if there is no physical thing to represent it? And shit, I’ve been neglecting my homework to always remind both of us about how happy we are now for quite a while. Damn, this is so bad. At the end of the day, I don’t think happiness can be fully captured by air tickets or movie passes. Happiness would be how I feel it, interpret it and express it into objects. And I want to give that of my “physical happinesses” to Gau to let him know I’m happy and I’m thankful for that.
And not only to Gau, I am extending my thoughts to all who have been loving me and taking care of me. My family, my good friends, a helpful stranger …
What should I do about this for the new year? Should I consider some resolutions?